#in a way. i guess. i dunno
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guys this "keeping myself busy with distractions so I don't get sad" thing isn't working
#my mom is basically scrubbing the house of all traces of her bc thats how she copes. thats what she did when dad died#like two days later she was cleaning out all his medical equipment and stuff#i guess thats a way of dealing with it :( just doesnt really work for me because it makes me feel their absence even harder#like for me i personally wanted to keep Dad's stuff around for a while because. idk i guess it just felt like he was still kind of there#in a way. i guess. i dunno#obviously losing a pet is easier to deal with than losing a parent but it still blows dude i hate this#(* a parent that you had a good relationship with. i know that im very fortunate in that regard. not everyone had that and i need to count#my blessings)#idk this feels harder than losing my childhood dog because jojo was basically my constant companion for the past several years#after dad died i got suicidally depressed and didnt leave the house and was unemployed for a good chunk of time and she kept me company#taking her for walks and hikes was the only thing i enjoyed doing and the only thing that got me out of the house. she was always there#(also there's probably some psychological component to the fact that we adopted her specifically to be a companion for dad#when he was wheelchair-bound and couldnt go anywhere. so she kept him company. and then after he died she did the same for me#so. idk. like.... i feel like theres something there lol)#mia.txt#animal death
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for anyone too young to know this: watching The Truman Show is a vastly different experience now, compared to how it was before youtube and social media influencers became normal
before it was like, "what a horrifying thing to do to a human being! to take away their autonomy and privacy, all for the sake of profits! to create fake scenarios for them to react to, just to retain viewership! to ruin their happiness just so some corporate entity could harvest money from their very humanity! how could anyone do something so evil?"
and now it's like, "ah, yeah. this is still deeply fucked up, but it's pretty much what every influencer has been doing to their kids for a decade now. probably bad that we've normalized this experience"
#the truman show#sbs rambles#I keep thinking about how children on popular youtube channels should probably have laws to protect them#social workers assigned to them maybe#I dunno#they did not sign up to have their lives sold for profit#but here we are#tho#I guess none of us signed up for it#and our data is harvested more than ever#god#high-tech capitalism sucks turns out#OH WAIT because tumblr is bad at getting context sometimes#let me specify:#I am not saying that the movie The Truman Show is bad or that it normalizes this#like all good sci-fi (because it is kind of sci-fi) it's there to warn us of what the future could hold#and it did that in a very good way - it's a beautiful movie#I could see someone with a bad faith take assuming I meant that it was part of the problem#it absolutely wasn't. it didn't normalize this; we did#youtube did and social media#it's us that's the problem#or more specifically: big corporations and a lack of regulation#that's the origin of most modern problems
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Permission to headbutt: Granted (Patreon)
#My art#UT#Sans#Papyrus#Ft. something smol and I do on a regular basis ♪#This could be Handplates or it could be classic Undertale I leave that up to you lol#I definitely picked up a lot of the style quirks lol - but there are some of the ones that I like myself! Like Papyrus' darkmode clothes lol#And Sans' shorts having the stripe in the front haha - little details ♫#Realistically it probably is Handplates tho just based on where my head's at lol - I love the Handplates dynamic :D#Handplates#I talked myself into it! Pfft ♪#I found myself relating a lot to Sans especially while rereading - I want nothing more in the world than for my siblings to be happy! <3#So I gathered up a bunch of ideas of things especially me and smol do together and this was the most obviously cute one haha#Easiest to do! Tho I did still go a little extra on this lol#I'm trying to do more digital stuff ♪ It wasn't the best art day and I'm still a little nervous to jump right in :')#Not doing any sketches on paper beforehand feels weird but I guess it is thematic in a way lol#And I'm still pleased with how they turned out hehe#It really does feel nice to be drawing them again <3#And doing silly sibling things! Hehe#I dunno how clear it is since it's so ingrained into how smol and I talk to each other lol family language!#One of us will literally just announce ''bonk'' and the other will prepare for/lean in for a headbutt haha#She is a tiny bit taller than me - it's not quite /this/ extreme but she does lean down for me! S'cute <3#I like to think Papyrus would do the same hehe ♪ Let your lazy brother headbutt you! He can only reach so far!#On minimal effort anyhow hehe#It's just a fun way to be silly together ♫♪#Also yes I did show this to her and she cosigned lol - ''Cute'' -smol
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Finally got around to drawing these two idiots
Two bonuses from doodle boards:
#myart#chainshipping#saw#saw franchise#saw movies#adam stanheight#adam faulkner stanheight#adam saw#lawrence gordon#lawrence saw#saw 2004#saw 3d#I Dunno if u guys can tell but!!! I got a new art program and i messed around ALOT with the features w the painting#Best way to commemorate a new art program is with chainshipping ig 🫶#I love pathetic wet cat middle aged men yaoi#P.S. if anyone can guess the reference I made w adams look…. i love u#Im so glad i actually finished this before pride month ends 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#Can anyone tell that I like lawrence can anymone tell i like him a lot ca#original idea came from a literal dream where it was just Saw 3d but Adam kicked ass
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Eddie is beginning to wonder if he’ll ever reach a point where Steve couldn’t reduce him to this state.
This state being… transfixed. Eddie is sure he must look like a lovesick cartoon. In fact, if he could manage to drag his gaze away, he’d probably find red hearts circling around his head in a halo, popping like little bubbles.
But Eddie can’t move his eyes. Can’t even close his mouth either.
Steve’s talking to him too, which is most definitely worse — he’s totally missing every word. He can see Steve’s lips moving, pink plush lips wrapping around words but fuck, that was a total trap because now Eddie is just looking at his lips. He tries to refocus, to listen. His eyes just wander back to what he was staring back at the first place.
Was Steve like this all the time? Just a walking around looking so damn delectable?
Or is it Eddie, just a starved man who’s been living off stolen glances, for as long as he can remember? For once, he’s learning, he’s allowed to look.
And by God, is he looking.
Steve’s not even doing it on purpose either, which probably makes the whole thing funnier. Eddie knows what his boyfriend (boyfriend! he thinks giddily in his mind) looks like when he’s cleaned up to impress. He can spot the way Steve preens beneath Eddie’s lingering gaze.
This is not that. Today, Steve is just cleaning, a usual Sunday morning ritual.
He’s got some old sport shorts on and he’s clearly grown a bit since he first got them— unless Hawkins has always been giving out slutty little shorts to the basketball team (They haven’t. Eddie would know if they did.)
He’s wearing one of his wife-beater singlets too. It’s a little on the scrappy side though, considering it’s nearly see-through with how worn it is.
Honestly, in Eddie’s humble and gay opinion, it’s stupidly hot. The dark hair dusted across of Steve’s chest is visible beneath it, the shirt showing off the shape of his broad chest. Even better, his happy trail is visible and goddamn, if that doesn’t make Eddie happy, he doesn’t know what will.
But it’s not even that.
Quite frankly, Eddie’s rather embarrassed that he’s basically blue-screening because Steve is pulling out the cord out from the vacuum cleaner.
But… but he’s yanking it up towards his chest, slow and strong repetitive motions— that take enough effort to make his biceps bulge with every tug.
Eddie can’t stop watching. The cord must be several metres long and he’s not sure if he should be cursing it or thanking it for the view he gets; Steve’s tan arms flexing and rippling. Try as he might, Eddie can’t help imagining how they must look when Steve’s got his hand aroun—
“—hello? Are you even listening to me?”
Steve’s voice cuts into Eddie’s dangerously side-tracked thoughts and he pauses his tugging at the same time. It’s the thing that finally allows him to break his lustful stare at Steve’s arms. Oh God, he just got all hot and bothered over his boyfriend doing the vacuuming.
“Hello.” Eddie says back, because that was the first word to register in his brain. “I mean- yes. I’m—”
Eddie decides mid-sentence that he’s not getting away with the lie. He pivots. “Okay, no, I didn’t hear that. Would you please tell me what you just said, oh lovely sweet man of mine?”
Ever the butterer-upper, he was. Thank God it works on Steve. He rolls his eyes a little but there’s an adoring grin on his lips.
“Man of mine,” Steve mutters amusedly under his breath. He drops the vacuum cord on the carpeted floor and leans down the grab the handle of the vacuum. “You just kinda froze when you came in. I was asking if everything was okay? I’m just doing this room then I’ll be done, if you don’t like the noise.”
Eddie adores that Steve’s taken his silence as though he might be afraid of the vacuum cleaner or something. He nearly snorts aloud at how far from the truth it is.
“Uh huh.” Eddie nods, not bothering to correct him. He jerks a thumb behind him, pointing at nothing. “I’m just gonna…”
He spins on his heel and exits left stage, fast as he can while still looking normal (he’s unsuccessful, as he leaves a baffled Steve behind him.) As he enters into the kitchen and decides to fix them both a pot of coffee, Eddie lets himself giggle over the pure absurdity of what just happens.
It’s mortifying. It’s hilarious. He can never tell Steve.
Except, when Steve comes to find him in the kitchen and trades a kiss for some coffee, Eddie can’t help it. All he ever wants to do is make Steve laugh.
He decides it’s worth the embarrassment when Steve laughs so hard coffee comes out his nose.
Steve teasingly promises that he’ll to try be less distracting, then rescinds his words at Eddie’s abject reaction (“Don’t you dare.”) looking far too smug— in a delighted sort of way. Preening, in that way Eddie loves.
Their first kiss, as Eddie slides onto Steve’s lap and loops his arms over his shoulders, fingers dancing on those tasty arms, tastes a little bit like coffee. Their mugs grow cold, untouched.
Eddie doesn’t mind — he’s too busy finding out that the rest of their kisses taste like something between sunlight and Steve.
#have; the thought i’ve been having every time i vacuum#i’m one of those bitches who just like pulls out the cord the whole way when i start#and now i say so is steve#just a lil ficlet to get my writing brain up again#ruby writes steddie#steddie#steve x eddie#steddie fic#steddie ficlet#steve harrington#eddie munson#fluff#it’s always just fluff with me innit#<3#i dunno how active we all still are…… 🧐#guess i’ll find out
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when martha jones is dying, all sorts turn up on her doorstep. mickey sent out messages everywhere to everywhen, and they all came. people she’d helped, friends she’d loved, the odd alien or two who’d wanted to whisk her away for a romance across the stars
captain jack harkness is the last of all of them
she isn’t sure how long it’s been for jack, he looks ever the same. she saw him last a few years ago when he left earth for some adventure, but martha knows time travelers, knows the look on someone’s face when it’s been a hundred years since they last saw you
sad and happy and regret and just plain old love
jack tells her stories. makes her laugh. holds her thin hand in the night when she’s shaking and cold under three blankets but mickey needs all the sleep he can get
he loves her just as plainly as he always has, because it was never about her youth or her beauty but about her, about the universal Force that is martha jones
and she loves him, because she always will, because when you fly through the time vortex with people they get stuck in your heart and never leave you
martha spends three days debating with mickey if she should tell jack. about new new york, and the motorway, and his actual, permanent death. they wonder if it would help him, that there really was going to be an end someday, or if it’ll just hurt knowing he’ll have to spend billions of years forced back to life before he’s allowed to rest
jack leaves on the fourth day. martha and mickey wave goodbye from the garden steps. jack kisses them both on each cheek and then the mouth, a last goodbye for when the word just isn’t enough
“jack!” martha calls out as his vortex manipulator beep-boops an incoming teleport. he turns back just as the light surrounds him, “you are not alone.” jack raises his arm in a salute, and that is the last they ever see of him
she dies two weeks later, home on earth with mickey and tish and leo beside her, with the sound of all the kids and grandkids playing in the garden floating up to her window. and she knows. knows that the time will come and the universe will turn on and on and on, and one day
martha jones and captain jack harkness will be together for the final time, again
continuation of this post
#lemon speaks#doctor who#martha jones#captain jack harkness#jack harkness#not slash but you can read it that way i guess#i dunno i think everyone loves each other#edited#there were just a couple typos#and then a couple passages i rewrote to flow better#i did Not edit this before i posted so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Things that I know.
1. Yaoi is the opposite of yuri
2. According to tumblr, yuri seems to be just about anything, but I have most commonly seen it take the form of two inanimate objects in close proximity to one another. Eg minecraft furnace and crafting table, trains crashing into each other, etc.
Therefore, we can conclude that Yaoi is two inanimate objects that are very far apart from each other. The sun and the earth are yaoi.
#sun#earth#yaoi I guess#this too is yuri#this too is yaoi#I dunno how to tag its 11:17pm and nobody should ever expect anything from me#I’ll tag this as minecraft too why not#minecraft#trains#part of me said this to be funny and part of me loves the idea of the sun and the earth as a metaphor for romance#without the sun the earth would be cold and lifeless#a barren wasteland that could never imagine a hopeful future#yet the sun? without the earth it’s still the sun. sure it’s not THE sun but it still exists and it’s still there#the earth needs the sun. something that could leave at any time but chooses to stay out of love. the earth cannot benefit the sun#in any meaningful way but it does what it can because it wants to show the sun that it has noticed and it cares and it loves#humans-part of the earth. place the sun in their religions. their stories. anything to make the sun feel special.#the sunflowers. birds. ocean. all these parts of the earth chip in somehow. they want the sun to feel the love the earth feels for the sun#but the sun already feels that love#and the sun hopes the earth knows it#and the sun stays by the earth’s side because it loves the earth.#truly the best example of yaoi out there
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Learning how to draw glowing things!!
#one piece#ope ope no mi#donquixote rosinante#donquixote corazon#vewu art#drawing law's devil fruit felt a little bit like drawing wrinkled brain at some point xd#dunno if i'll make whole poster out of it (it contains handsssss mhrgrhrg) maybe. maybe not. we'll see#either way - glowing stuff fun to draw#lovely to look at#me likes#(my inner moth is manifesting i guess xdd)
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TW: Blood/injury, body horror
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Dazed
The very beginning | Previous | Next
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How are we still here y'all oh my stars...
#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#f!leo#future leo#rise cassandra#f!mikey#future michelangelo#bad future rottmnt#wrong fabricated time branch#no-thinked my way through this i dunno anymore..#*nervous laughter*#heh..#also!#i guess i kinda worded that last update wrong but like i mentioned i kinda wasn't thinking a whole lot when i drew this part so...oops#i didn't know this was gonna happen honestly..#:)
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#darkzyx#poll time#ok I’m just curious because I accidentally start writing important lore in the#tags like 80-90 % of the time#or just personal artist/author notes I guess???#I dunno haha#just extra stuff I wanted to say that I didn’t wanna make like#blatantly obvious with the caption#I love reading tags on posts and reblogs since it’s sort of tumblr’s way of commenting and sharing#at the same time!#and it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize this tumblr culture haha#after all#I posted to Instagram way more before tumblr#so I didn’t really think to read the tags on things until tumblr#anyways enough rambling haha
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you are worth all the struggle and bloody mess
[id in alt text]
#falin touden#marcille donato#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#blood#gore#(actually pom juice but just in case)#awhile back i saw a bunch of posts about how pomegranates are worth the effort and bloodiness of trying to open them#in like a vague poetic romanticizing way.. you know the genre of tumblr post#and thought of how much marcille was willing to do to get falin back#i dunno. not sure how to explain what i was going for here#'what if the red dragon was a huge pomegranate that marcille had to dig falin out of with her bare hands'#..i guess that's basically it actually#fan art#my art#not very accurate pomegranate drawing either but it was more fun to stylize like this and i wanted it to look kinda fleshy#for the red dragon/necromancy/general visceral struggle comparison
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Am I the only one who thinks its weird that despite being the most resistant to using the tadpoles powers, the first thing lae'zel does after the nautiloid crash is use the tadpole link to talk to you
#can't sleep so having lae'zel thoughts as usual#it just seems like a very odd things for her to do#I thought maybe it was hinting at it being a gith thing#cuz psionics can be used for telepathy and the way the connection is described is a bit different from the usual tadpole way#but I also don't think lae'zel is quite skilled enough to do that yet#I dunno something to think more on I guess
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cross-posting some stuff i like from my personal twitter / text from here
#the terror#james fitzjames#francis crozier#fitzier#hooonnnestly i'm not sure these are finished enough i would consider them appropriate for this blog#but tbh... i really like some of the frames in this set#and i think the format works much better in a long post like this than in just discrete images as on twt#i dunno. either way ! hi i guess
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A god must feed; a god must be fed.
How do we make something outside of that?
#the silt verses#paige duplass#this is MY prophet :)#my lines#i originally wanted to make this with way more gore but then backed out#dunno why#looks cleaner this way i guess#more ambigious
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#star wars#jedi#pro jedi#anti acolyte#anti the acolyte#acolyte critical#the acolyte critical#leslye headland critical#y'all out there being hopeful like this showrunner has not made it EXPLICITLY CLEAR what she thinks of the jedi#and it is NOT POSITIVE#this is going to be an anti jedi mess and we KNOW THIS WITH 100% CERTAINTY BECAUSE THE SHOWRUNNER HAS SAID IT OUTRIGHT#i dunno what everyone is being so optimistic about#if you like the jedi - GENUINELY LIKE THE JEDI - i dunno what you think you're gonna get out of this show#but then i saw pro jedi people enjoy the ahsoka show so#some people have a WAY higher tolerance for jedi critical bullshit than i do i guess#and a much greater ability to just throw some rose colored glasses on so they can pretend the narrative isn't as anti jedi as it is
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“The man is a public danger. There are lonely houses scattered over the moor, and he is a fellow who would stick at nothing.”
[…]
“I assure you, Sir Henry, that in a very few days the necessary arrangements will have been made and he will be on his way to South America.”
Reading it as a kid, I don’t think I gave it a second thought, but, uh… this seems kind of rough on South America.
#letters from watson#i guess i really was young when i read these the first time#i keep running across things which at the time i accepted as just. i dunno. the mysterious ways of the world#and now for example i get to the end of A Case Of Identity and go “…hold on. i’m not convinced that’s a good idea actually.”#or “wait a minute i don’t think shipping the spree killer to another continent will completely solve the problem”
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